Tomorrow will be a day for sure

I’ve almost completed my certificate 3 in individual supports. What kind of job will I use that to get? I hear you asking and to that I say I have absolutely no clue whatsoever, I have made zero decisions abt my future. Anyways, so I’ve done my disability hours for placement and tomorrow is my orientation day to start doing 7 hour unpaid shifts every day for two weeks at an aged care facility. Tomorrow is orientation so I gotta get there at 9am but after that all my shifts are from 2pm to 9pm and I start getting irritated by the presence of others by 7pm. Kinda sucks cuz I don’t got nothing to really motivate me, I mean, I just do what I gotta do to keep people off my back I guess. I was supposed to do my laundry today, I thought about it all day, but I didn’t do it. Luckily I found one last pair of clean underwear and my jeans dont smell  and I have a uniform shirt so I have clothes for tomorrow but I’ll have to make sure to just wash the next days outfit every day until placement is over since I only have 2 work shirts anyways. I’ll probably be fine, I just probably won’t enjoy it very much. I’m not looking forward to it. It sucks I won’t be able to come home to a cute text or sleep call or come home excited to tell them about my day since nothing is the same anymore. I sleep with the plushie I made of him. I’m a pathetic loser. Anyways, work tomorrow. It’s almost 10pm, I should go to sleep. If the post time says otherwise it’s the vpn. Don’t even trust that shit Fr. okay goodnight nobody because no one is reading this. No one says goodnight or Goodmorning to me. I wish I didn’t have to be alive but I was cursed with empathy so I will live I just hate it and none of this is worth it to me I don’t want any of this. Whatever, goodnight Fr, 

Just a thoughts about TADC

 I believe the show was somewhat rushed in a way, not that it was low quality in any way, production wise it’s a masterpiece. The problem I have is that the show doesn’t exactly flow, it’s fun and games with hints of each of their deep inner problems and then boom the last 2 episodes we go into serious mode because we decided to turn them into a movie for uhh money? Probably, and by all means, get that bag goosey. But anyways, it gets kinda serious and then EVERYTHING is explained really fast, Jax abstracts off screen so we don’t even get to see an abstraction or see any kind of action, they go through all that really fast so they can get to the part that the creator cares about which is the character exploration of Jax, which is also fine, whatever, it’s her show, she can focus on her favourite character if she wants to. I think some people hold these really high standards for creators, especially ones that interact with their audience a lot. It’s not a crime to make a shitty show. Ofc it’s okay to critique the show but you don’t gotta be shitty to the actual creator about it. Anyways I went off topic. The thing about the ending that I think is just a little silly is the fact that Jax’s real life counterpart hasn’t transitioned. I hear the argument of “she’s boymoding” which first of all, goose did make the mistake of thinking most people know what that even means, I haven’t even heard the word outside of twitter, and I’m not on any forums, and neither are most people I would assume and it’s not like it’s a small YouTube project anymore, this show was coming out on Netflix as they were making it so it would make sense to make your character understandable to the general audience. People will come in here talking about some “media literacy” bullshit but I don’t think it is very fair to the audience to make this character the centre of our attention and then be extremely vague about key parts of the character, not when these are the final episodes. They seemed to understand that for every other character besides Jax. Well, for every character they showcased the irl counterpart of at least. They were making sure to wrap everything nicely in a bow to show that each characters counterpart had overcome the issues the brain scans are currently dealing with because they are outdated brain scans, but not Jax. 

I just suddenly stopped caring about this and need to write about something else so more on that later. Maybe.

Proof of life

Hello and welcome, you will come to know me simply as V, and this is my "digital diary".

Although I like to think of it as a digital mindspace, if that makes any sense. I can put anything here. To respect privacy, I'll use an alias whenever I mention someone from my life. I thought I should let you know that in advance. I don't think many people will discover this blog, but I think that's part of the appeal, so I don't mind. There's not a whole lot to say here. Rather than doing an entry a day like a diary, this will be more like a collection of thoughts. I'll have to start compiling topics to write about. Hopefully, I figure out what I'm doing and stick to it. I have memory issues, so documenting my life feels somewhat important to me. Even if I remember events, I know nothing about my past selves, I never remember what I was thinking or feeling. I make assumptions about what I thought about a situation based on how I'd feel if it happened now because I don't know. Anyways, this is a nothing post. When I have a subject to write about, it'll probably be better.

 For now, this is a start.